Yesterday alone, I had two random people who didn’t know me from Adam, ask me about my cane. Well, one asked if I had the cane because I thought it looked cool. The other flat-out asked me what was wrong with me that I needed to use a cane.
The first one was easy. My cane is a standard issue medical supply cane that is far from cool looking. I laughed, commented as much and simply shared that the cane helped me to walk better. That seemed to be enough and then the guy was distracted by my dog Duke.
I wasn’t prepared at all for the second one. I no more than stepped inside the door of a restaurant with a friend I hadn’t seen in a while, and this guy says, “What’s wrong with you?” “What do you use that for?” Taken aback, all I could say was that it helps me walk. That worked earlier in the day, so I figured what the heck.
It wasn’t enough, and while they were seating us (we chose to sit far away from this guy), he was still trying to ask me questions about my cane and why I was using it. He too had a disability of some sort, but it wasn’t the time or place to engage him in that conversation.
My friend and I laughed about this later on during our meal. None of it bothered me, although I did feel badly that I couldn’t engage this very blunt man in a discussion about mobility issues. It seemed odd that both happened within hours of one another.
Back in the early days of the illness when I was in the wheelchair so quickly, I was saddened to realize that what people saw first was my chair. Couldn’t they see me first?
I had a lot of trouble letting go of that idea the entire time I was in the chair. Part of that was that I couldn’t really see me first because of my sensitivities to being in the chair. Last week, it is possible these incidents would have upset me as well.
Yesterday was the start of a new week. New rules. I was surprised a bit by both of these interactions about my cane, and found them significant enough to share with you. There are so many parallels with what is happening now and when my illness first started. I find them interesting to note.
I wasn’t upset at all yesterday.
Anyone taking any bets either way?! 😉 Ha!
- Climbing the Toilet Paper Tower (thetawny.wordpress.com)
- Dogs, Love and Change (thetawny.wordpress.com)
- Stairs are NO match for The Tawny (thetawny.wordpress.com)
- Dogs, Babies and Baclofen (thetawny.wordpress.com)