Sharing the lessons along the way…

What Was I Thinking?


PhotoMailDid anyone wonder if I would really go to the Homeless Emergency Project (HEP) with Duke instead of clock watching and waiting for the baclofen decrease to take effect?

After all of that math, it turned out that last week’s decrease was only 5%, which is why I didn’t feel much and it took it longer.  That meant I probably would notice something different sooner this week.

Tuesday night, I wondered if I would have still gone to HEP had I not proclaimed it all so boldly on Monday.  I certainly could have changed my mind, but that would have defeated my purpose for the proclamation!

I suspected I might become anxious about being somewhere else.  I knew I needed to do it anyway.  I did become anxious.  I did go anyway.  I might have let myself out of it if I hadn’t set it up to be accountable to you.

As Duke and I made our rounds at HEP today, the decrease in intrathecal baclofen was notable from the start.  I noticed more tightness and some muscle cramping before going to bed Tuesday, so I figured it was going to be an interesting day.

Walking was harder and took more effort.  My left leg feels like it weighs 500 pounds.  My right leg about 100.  It will take me some time to be able to describe much else about the differences.  Driving was ok round trip.

Duke and I took the stairs and while I did get up them, I might be ok not doing that Monday.  Of course, I thought the same thing two decreases ago and was able to improve both my walking speed with the cane and my stair climbing.

Duke and I talked to people we had hoped to get to talk to, and many new folks got some quality time with my DOG.  We were rockin’ it so much that I left several hours after I had planned.  We were all over HEP’s campus through the day—upright, walking at whatever speed I could walk with the cane.

I wasn’t obsessed with the changes.  I wasn’t obsessed with the time.  It really didn’t matter except that I needed to make sure I allowed enough time in between point A to point B.

Now I question my own line of thinking for not going.  Duke and I together could probably move a mountain after we blaze another trail or two.  He is the perfect partner to have at the end of a leash on an adventure.

Never mind the crazy amount of support I have from the folks at HEP.  It is as safe a place to be as any I can think of.

I am not sure exactly what I was worried about now that I did it.  Isn’t it funny how that turned out?

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