Sharing the lessons along the way…

Posts tagged ‘stubborness’

Uh oh, I am an idiot!

Dunce

Dunce (Photo credit: Candie_N)

If I did nothing else Friday, my goals included going to my primary care doctor’s appointment at 10am and catching up on ALL of my laundry at the laundromat.

My day began by oversleeping because I have not adjusted to the time change (seriously, the sun does not come up until nearly 8am).  It was cold (by FL standards) and I get nowhere fast in the cold.

As a result, the morning was rushed and chaotic.  I made my appointment, and later, I sorted and packed up ALL of my laundry into what I thought was manageable lifting bundles, then went to the laundromat.

As I have shared in a previous blog, many epiphanies and/or synchronicities happen for me at The Mat.  This day was no exception.

Friday, I learned the following:

I am an idiot!!

Before you start being harsh with me for being harsh with myself, let me explain.

I already know taking laundry to The Mat is painful.  Any lifting and twisting hurts, period.  That is why I had so much laundry to begin with.  I am not sure what made me think today was any different.

To add to this knowledge, more than once, a couple of different friends have offered to help me with my laundry.

“I will do your laundry for you…” and “I am always here to help…”

“Thank you, BUT I have too much…I really need to be able to take care of my own stuff…I will figure out how…”

Really, Tawny?!

Midway through the folding-hanging up clothes-dryer game I like to play, I was nearly in tears from the pain.  The dryer game of getting things out at the perfect time to hang, fold, save quarters, etc. was essentially over for me.  I had to stop playing.

When the challenge became not crying before I even got to folding the sheets, I realized just how little I really know about surrender.

I felt like I was the one wearing the dunce hat, yet again at The Mat.  And honestly, I was.

I could have averted all of that by saying “Thank you, yes…”

On the other hand, is that what I needed to experience to move forward with alternative plans for the short and long-term related to laundry?

My stubbornness has often served me.  Friday, not so much at The Mat.

What role is your hard head playing in your ability (or not) to move forward with a better plan in your life?

Kitt O’Malley

Bipolar Writer and Mental Health Advocate

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